the dilemma of the modern malay women part 1

I like to observe people and just sometimes make theories and assumptions about their life n stuff.Having read Malay Dilemma by Tun Mahathir n yearning for quite sometime now to read his latest tome, I suddenly come with the idea of jotting some thoughts along those lines. Now.. I know some of you will just laugh me off but Tun Mahathir's thoughts are brilliant and he hit some things right on the mark especially about the bit that more n more young women are populating higher institutions compared to their male counterparts. So what become of these young women in the future? Well let me tell you what I've found out..these are some social observations that felt true to someone who considered herself as a modern malay women. Being a women is hard enough and unlike their western counterparts malay women had it even tougher..it is not enough that u got all A's in SPM or what not..graduating with flying colours from the uni is the easiest part..honestly getting a job is easier for me at least..the hardest part is well..trying to find a man that can accept you. I know it's cliche and probably throw me back a few years back in feminisim but really the world haven't change much actually. I've tons of single successful girlfriends who are still not married. Heck..even my sister and my sister in law are not married. Why? Are they too choosy? Aren't they pretty enough? Nope..the guys are the problem..in the Malay world, women can never outshine the men. You can be successfull but you cannot flaunt, you can be modern but you are expected to go into the kitchen and cook regularly, you can be smart but you better shut your mouth and keep your thoughts to yourself. It's tiring to be someone your not. Being sarcastic is a no-no. Future mother in laws will never ask what ur CGPA is or how many A's u manage to get in ur SPM. Nah..in reality women are supposed to look good and appear soft and ladylike to grab these few quality Malay guys that are hard to find. Sometimes being stuck in the office with nothing to do, I do make some crazy theories such as: -what's the point of studying hard and achieving greatness in your early years or studies if in the end people will just judge how successfull you are by looking whether you are taken or not..or in malay words laku -so it's just better that women act dumb and wait for men to marry them like in the Regency era or something where debutantes go to balls and look for suitable suitor Really it's sad that in my course of life i've met some really smart but slightly older women who are successful but people will still talk like this e.g eh tak kahwin lagi?tula eksyen sangat sebab pangkat tinggi bla bla bla siapa nak bla bla but what happens if the women are not that successful? e.g siapa nak minah tu biasa je tak cantik pun gosh,people are damn cruel!and people who said things such as these are women themselves. so the next time you meet with a single women please be kind and don't say things like bila nak kawin? or gossip about them being tak laku or jual mahal let's change the malay perception one at a time..shall we?

the girl with the lil monster

Let's continue the bit of the housewife thingy another time. Someone has been complaining that I get boring when I got married..hehehe.Quoting a certain you-know-who..'all married people ever talked about are their kids and husbands and cooking'. Gosh..am I one of those boring housewives who posted pictures of their cookings and recipes in their blogs?Hey..i love that kind of blogs which some people think kind of lame but I am housewife, I need to cook right?Ah..I am turning into a bore.

It has been one of my secret dream job to be a reviewer. I mean..if u work like in the The New York Times, u r paid handsomely, u get free stuff and people are scared of u..hahaha..the book, movie or even food critic in The Times must have a blast doing their job. I had the privilege of reading a very good book this month.

The Girl With The Dragon Tattoo
Normally, I would not read such heavy stuff because such books would haunt you and you just can't stop thinking about it even after you have finished it. But curiousity got the best of me and I grab this book wondering what all the hype is all about. Oooh it certainly live up to all the hype. Quite dark actually. Normal Malay readers (or even normal Malay women) would not find this entertaining..hehehe very XS adult book which actually remind me of Miss Wanie's fav J.D. Robb series.

It's about Blomkvist; a journalist who is investigating the disapperance of an heiress Harriet Vanger at the family gathering which happened some time ago. The suspects includes the members of the wealthy but weird Vanger family who each have their own hidden agenda.

The mystery and characters are riveting but the book has a very documentary feel and quite dragging at times. It's a complex whodunnit book. U have to really read it page by page otherwise u'll be missing important clues. The girl with the dragon tattoo actually referred to Lisbeth Salander; a hacker who is helping Blomkvist with the snooping. She's a brilliant gothic chick with a secret past which will be revealed in the next 2 books.

Spoilers alert! I really like the ending because Stieg Larsson have the decency not to kill the heiress. It's a nice twist rather than ending it with the cliche 'the heiress' body was found buried somewhere..' . There's a real dark and sinister secret behind her disappearance and women readers will be cringing at times reading this novel.

Conclusion: a good read but quite heavy. If ur not into this kind of stuff maybe u should read a nice feel-good chick lit instead which I did just to get the gory stuff of this book out of my mind.
Yup..I'm not good with horror movie and violence. I love mystery novels but sometimes the eerieness kind of stuck with u..right?

Desperate housewives part 1 ..of baking, cooking, mothering n etc

Originally i planned an entry about my all-time favourite romantic comedies or my all-time favourite 80's movies but yesterday's entry made my thoughts wander all the way to my mum..particularly her cooking hehe. My mum quit her job to raise the 4 of us (meaning my sis,my bro,me and my younger bro) and I've only grown to really appreciate her sacrifice these past few years when I have a kid of my own and suddenly starting this year (by choice n temporarily) stuck in the house most of the time with nothing to do. I mean there's lots to do but not with a 2 year old in tow..haha. Don't get me wrong, I mean I lurve...my son but sometimes..(big sigh) he's such a brat. Doing household chores is a bore for someone who's used to the fast-paced world of the office and housewife is the toughest job in the world since u will not get paid, no leave and you are expected to work 24 hours cleaning, cooking n doing unimaginable stuff for ur family..ah..After 3 months I'm already bored out of my wits, I can't imagine my mum doing this for something like 30 years n still going strong..wasn't she bored? My mum confessed that she is not a good cook when she first got married (so there's still hope for the rest of us,eh?) but that is really quite hard to believe.

I mean she made the best chicken curry and her gulai ketam is to die for! I'm talking about big fat crabs stuffed in the pot with coconut milk..nyum nyum nyum. I just have this weakness with any dish saturated with santan, masak lemak kubis, gulai pucuk paku, gulai lemak cili api.. anything to do with santan is fine by me. Miss Wanie complained that all I ever cook while living together with her (during my carefree single years) is something along those lines..Well u see it's my mum's cooking influence, the 4 of us r raised with that kind of food so it came as a shock when my hubby ask for something like asam pedas. We hardly ever eat that dish and I've never cook it before, so can u imagine the disaster it will be? Oooh I prefer frying and grilling them..ikan cencaru sumbat anyone?

But I think my mum's talent really shines in baking. She's good with pastries and even sells her kek lapis rempah which is really torturous to make. All day baking layers after layers of cake..ah..such a torture!

With obviously lots of time in my hand..I've tried baking stuff just for the fun of it. Simple stuff like cupcakes n muffins which my lil tyke can get his hands on..he's my faithful taster n I'm so touched whenever he eats my experiments..which sometimes did not turn out well..oops. My hubby is a picky eater being a chef n all, most of the time he would just take a glance at my cooking without even tasting or eating it. When I first got married his pickiness really annoys me but now I just cook what I like to cook n eat so I don't get starved or just drive through the nearest McD hoho..(I'm a lazy mum). Here he is cooking gulai ikan patin in the middle of the night n forcing moi to learn how to cook it. If u see closely my lil tyke is behind him crying his eyes out coz he wants to play with his daddy. I mean cooking is hard enough..and with a 2 year old breathing down ur neck..aiyayaiyai. So please excuse me if I don't cook every day like my mum used to do. I mean she's the best. She's supermom just like my Mak Andak I guess..I will just settle with baking muffins once in a while..maybe almond, or pecan (which I have a lot of since last year..oops) or maybe even carrot or mango which is freezing in my fridge right now..hmm..decisions..decisions and if I ever get fat I'll just exercise on my kinetic OTO bike. Mind you I am getting fat..hahaha