the joys of not having it all

I have a confession to make. I have an unhealthy obsession with all things New York. Be it movies, books, tv shows, Broadway...you name it babe. I just like the illussions of grandeur which I know I will never get in my lifetime. Hey,but a girl can dream right? If anyone can cure me of this particular sickness please do show me the way...hehehe.(As Maher Zain sang it in his song).

I've actually bought several books last month but this one outshines the others by leaps and bounds well to me at least. It reminds me of one the first 'adult' book I bought way back when I was still a teenager. Judith Krantz's 'I'll Take Manhattan'. I mean it's just soo glamorous and fun and full of make believe fantasies about the lives of rich people that you just have to love it.Sorry.

One Fifth Avenue by Candace Bushnell

As the title suggests its about the residents of this posh apartment in Fifth Avenue, NYC. Mindy Gooch; the co-op president, Enid; the veteran gossip columnist, Peter; her screenplay writer nephew,Schiffer Diamond; the actress and the Rices'; the new millionaire couple who just move in.

The characters are believable and the story with its tragedies and mysteries has a nice happy ending at the end. (Some characters die). Surely, Candace as the writer of Sex and the City will not disappoint fans of chick lit. The building actually exists! I mean..look at all these pictures of an 11 room duplex owned by a Broadway producer which is actually up for sale.

Oooh it has always been my dream to have a library like this at home. Just a nice cozy place where you can curl and immersed yourself in books. Amazing. And the view outside the terrace is to die for! You can actually see the famous Central Park. (More ooohs..) But that view came with a hefty 33 million price tag.(Damn, and I thought terraces in Bangi is overpriced). Only billionaires can live in a place like this where it was rumoured to have Rupert Murdoch as one of its residents. Wow! In Malaysia, we have supreme condos at the golden triangle going for a cool 3 million. But who has that kind of money?I mean..really? Real estate everywhere has skyrocketed. And for middle class people like me it has been a nightmare trying to find a house you can actually afford. Yeah so the government has introduced the Skim Rumah Pertamaku but middle class people don't qualify for that (as most of us earn more than 3k a month) besides it's highly unrealistic! Where can you find a decent house for 220k in the Klang Valley?Nah.. For the time being I'll just be grateful for having a roof over my head and pray that some day I'll have a nice cozy library where I can just totally unwind. Praying really hard..oh please God.

the dilemma part 2

My youngest brother had just received his SPM results and later on declared that he will be pursuing an education focusing on culinary. Hmm..it got me thinking that if more and more men are professional cooks what will become of the women? Maybe we should do the hard jobs like becoming bosses,judges, police officers and such. But why is it hard for women to be promoted?
If according Tun M, about 60 to 70% of enrollment in universities comprised of females where have they dissappeared once they start working?And what happen to all the men? Have all of them become Mat Rempit?Hohohoho..

Unfortunately in Malaysia, gender bias is still deep rooted in every aspect. People hate women bosses claiming that they are emotional,picky and weak. Most bosses are still men. In one occasion which I faintly recall one of my male ex-boss said to me smilingly, "Darling no one likes a smart mouth". I'm not sure whether that's a compliment or him just telling me to shut up.Oooh...

According to Marina Mahathir who actually read the World Economic Forum Gender Gap Report, in Malaysia women exceeds men only in university enrolment and life expectancy. Ah..which means we are smarter and we live longer?Hmm that's depressing.The reality is disheartening. Most of these bright young women who believe that they can do it all realised that the unchanging attitudes of most Malays or Malaysians make it hard for them reach their true potential.

I have friends who graduated with honours in IT and engineering complained that they have a hard time finding jobs as most jobs required project site visits which are thought only suitable for men. It is quite sad to see my dear friends relegated to office jobs that did not do their justice. One of them even joined a multi national bank as call center operator at one point.

But if more and more men indulge in the artsy and glamorous careers so who will do all those dirty jobs?As Marina Mahathir aptly puts it in her blog in which she saluted her heroines in conjunction with Women's Day: 'The many young Malaysian women I know who are so sparklingly bright, energetic and enthusiastic that they give me hope in this country. Now, if only none of that energy is dampened by the unchanging attitudes in this country, they can actually make a difference.'

the dilemma of the modern malay women part 1

I like to observe people and just sometimes make theories and assumptions about their life n stuff.Having read Malay Dilemma by Tun Mahathir n yearning for quite sometime now to read his latest tome, I suddenly come with the idea of jotting some thoughts along those lines. Now.. I know some of you will just laugh me off but Tun Mahathir's thoughts are brilliant and he hit some things right on the mark especially about the bit that more n more young women are populating higher institutions compared to their male counterparts. So what become of these young women in the future? Well let me tell you what I've found out..these are some social observations that felt true to someone who considered herself as a modern malay women. Being a women is hard enough and unlike their western counterparts malay women had it even tougher..it is not enough that u got all A's in SPM or what not..graduating with flying colours from the uni is the easiest part..honestly getting a job is easier for me at least..the hardest part is well..trying to find a man that can accept you. I know it's cliche and probably throw me back a few years back in feminisim but really the world haven't change much actually. I've tons of single successful girlfriends who are still not married. Heck..even my sister and my sister in law are not married. Why? Are they too choosy? Aren't they pretty enough? Nope..the guys are the problem..in the Malay world, women can never outshine the men. You can be successfull but you cannot flaunt, you can be modern but you are expected to go into the kitchen and cook regularly, you can be smart but you better shut your mouth and keep your thoughts to yourself. It's tiring to be someone your not. Being sarcastic is a no-no. Future mother in laws will never ask what ur CGPA is or how many A's u manage to get in ur SPM. Nah..in reality women are supposed to look good and appear soft and ladylike to grab these few quality Malay guys that are hard to find. Sometimes being stuck in the office with nothing to do, I do make some crazy theories such as: -what's the point of studying hard and achieving greatness in your early years or studies if in the end people will just judge how successfull you are by looking whether you are taken or not..or in malay words laku -so it's just better that women act dumb and wait for men to marry them like in the Regency era or something where debutantes go to balls and look for suitable suitor Really it's sad that in my course of life i've met some really smart but slightly older women who are successful but people will still talk like this e.g eh tak kahwin lagi?tula eksyen sangat sebab pangkat tinggi bla bla bla siapa nak bla bla but what happens if the women are not that successful? e.g siapa nak minah tu biasa je tak cantik pun gosh,people are damn cruel!and people who said things such as these are women themselves. so the next time you meet with a single women please be kind and don't say things like bila nak kawin? or gossip about them being tak laku or jual mahal let's change the malay perception one at a time..shall we?

the girl with the lil monster

Let's continue the bit of the housewife thingy another time. Someone has been complaining that I get boring when I got married..hehehe.Quoting a certain you-know-who..'all married people ever talked about are their kids and husbands and cooking'. Gosh..am I one of those boring housewives who posted pictures of their cookings and recipes in their blogs?Hey..i love that kind of blogs which some people think kind of lame but I am housewife, I need to cook right?Ah..I am turning into a bore.

It has been one of my secret dream job to be a reviewer. I mean..if u work like in the The New York Times, u r paid handsomely, u get free stuff and people are scared of u..hahaha..the book, movie or even food critic in The Times must have a blast doing their job. I had the privilege of reading a very good book this month.

The Girl With The Dragon Tattoo
Normally, I would not read such heavy stuff because such books would haunt you and you just can't stop thinking about it even after you have finished it. But curiousity got the best of me and I grab this book wondering what all the hype is all about. Oooh it certainly live up to all the hype. Quite dark actually. Normal Malay readers (or even normal Malay women) would not find this entertaining..hehehe very XS adult book which actually remind me of Miss Wanie's fav J.D. Robb series.

It's about Blomkvist; a journalist who is investigating the disapperance of an heiress Harriet Vanger at the family gathering which happened some time ago. The suspects includes the members of the wealthy but weird Vanger family who each have their own hidden agenda.

The mystery and characters are riveting but the book has a very documentary feel and quite dragging at times. It's a complex whodunnit book. U have to really read it page by page otherwise u'll be missing important clues. The girl with the dragon tattoo actually referred to Lisbeth Salander; a hacker who is helping Blomkvist with the snooping. She's a brilliant gothic chick with a secret past which will be revealed in the next 2 books.

Spoilers alert! I really like the ending because Stieg Larsson have the decency not to kill the heiress. It's a nice twist rather than ending it with the cliche 'the heiress' body was found buried somewhere..' . There's a real dark and sinister secret behind her disappearance and women readers will be cringing at times reading this novel.

Conclusion: a good read but quite heavy. If ur not into this kind of stuff maybe u should read a nice feel-good chick lit instead which I did just to get the gory stuff of this book out of my mind.
Yup..I'm not good with horror movie and violence. I love mystery novels but sometimes the eerieness kind of stuck with u..right?